You posted Learning how to write a rational debate policy 21 days ago. You’ve now read and talked about part of one essay. This doesn’t appear to be working. It looks like – best guess – you just don’t really know how to do the things you’re trying to do. As I’ve written about in many essays, I’d suggest working on some projects that you could succeed at in under a day and incrementally building up instead of starting with things that are too difficult for you.
Big goals can be divided into smaller, easier sub-parts – it’s not necessary to do really hard steps to achieve them. Having a hard time is a sign that you should consider other approaches, such as dividing the project into smaller parts. But before trying to do small projects as steps within big projects, you should just do small projects at all, and focus on figuring out what productive things you can currently succeed at before deciding on next steps.