I think this is broadly true for most people across most movie genres. It is not specific to the themes in KPop Demon Hunters (not saying you or Elliot claimed it was).
There are entire genres of films that espouse values that the audience do not live.
For example, heroic action movies where one person is willing to stand up against injustice/evil/crime/violence, or even grayer action movies where one person is willing to go to extraordinary lengths to rescue someone/get vengeance/etc.
People love these movies, but most people don’t live values like that. Most people don’t stand up for their values or principles or even their loved ones to that extent. Most people do not experience the extreme scenarios in these stories, but they often don’t even stand up for this stuff to a much less extreme extent that would be relevant in their life.
Another example: There are detective stories where the detective is obsessed with solving a mystery and finding the truth. They keep pursuing the truth, come into conflict with superiors, and reject convenient falsehoods until they find the real answer. But most people don’t behave that way. Most cops don’t, but also just applied to regular life most people do not try to find truthful answers to problems with that kind of dedication.
Overall my guess is that a majority of films (and stories in general) promote values that the average viewer/fan of the film fails to live up to.
Why? I don’t really know, but I have some guesses.
Fictional stories are often pretty good at creating dramatic, extreme scenarios. These may be totally unrealistic, or they might be realistic but unusual in that most people don’t experience something quite as extreme. They do this for many reasons. A big one is: It’s more exciting and thus captures attention better.
But another reason is that those scenarios can make conflicts and problems clearer. Real life can be messy and confusing. Your personal biases and emotions can get in the way. In fiction, it is often easier to tell what’s going on. Stuff like… Who is the bad guy. Who has positive motives, who is misguided, who is evil. What are the stakes.
When it isn’t your life, and when so many of the variables are more clearly demonstrated in the story, it can be a lot easier to understand which principles are good and which are bad. But once the story ends and you go back to your real life, it may not be so easy to translate the same ideas. You aren’t a neutral observer. To you, everyone who fucks you over feels like the bad guy, with evil motives. Watching a movie you could e.g. recognize that a bad guy was misguided and deserves a second chance, but in real life you may not be able to see the same things.
Circling this back to KPDH a little… most people like the idea of being tolerant of differences and nice. When it is demonstrated in a film with an exaggerated scenario, it’s relatively easy to see what’s going on and how to be tolerant. The protagonist is nice and cool, so obviously we should be tolerant of her differences.
In real life, things are messy.
Being tolerant of flaws is good, though. And you totally live that value, for example you are tolerant of your dad’s flaw where he says the N word and complains about the Jews controlling the media, because he loves you and he is a good father and grandfather. And you believe being tolerant in general is good, which is why you are so concerned that the younger generation of atheists is so intolerant of Christianity nowadays.
And obviously, being tolerant is not the same thing as being stupid and self-destructive. The Demon Hunters accepted their friend’s flaws but they still killed the evil demons afterwards. They didn’t just welcome the demons into the human world. You know that wouldn’t be tolerant, it would be stupid and suicidal. And likewise, we can’t just welcome in 100 million illegals the way Biden did, that was stupid and suicidal. We have to get rid of them, because they are evil demons poisoning our country, and if that requires sending ICE into cities, suspending due process, putting the demons in camps, and killing people that try to stop us… well, you know that’s necessary to protect ourselves from this invasion.
Of course you’re tolerant of flaws and differences. But you can’t be tolerant of demons, obviously. You are tolerant of the flaws of the people you care about, people in your tribe. Because you’re a good person.