@MetaCreation asked:
Do you have any specific criteria in mind for what makes something “best”?
ET’s clarification answered your question.
My intuition takes the response as dismissive/a brush-off
Answering your question isn’t dismissive. But somehow you took it worse than you would have taken no reply.
Some hypotheticals I’ve gone through:
- If someone else had written my reply, and you had responded in the same way, would I have seen it as rude? Kind of, though I wouldn’t have had an emotional response and might not have stopped to think about it.
- If you hadn’t replied at all what would I think of it? Wouldn’t have cared very much, you don’t response to everything (but that’s not zero caring).
- Would it matter if you had replied with some sort of apology? I don’t think very much so, I don’t think it would change the sense of dismissal.
- Would it matter if you had replied with some sort of appreciative acknowledgement? I think so, I guess my intuition doesn’t mind not successfully helping if at least the attempt is appreciated.
Your brainstorming shows a bias towards assuming you’re right or good, and failing to consider scenarios where ET is right or good.
You interpretation seems to be that ET withheld deserved thanks. I think that’s a recurring, unstated premise that explains your intuitions. In other words, you’re assuming that you did good and that the misunderstanding was ET’s fault. You didn’t really consider scenarios in which an apology or thanks wouldn’t be merited.
What if the misunderstanding was your fault? What if your at-fault misunderstanding was likely to confuse others?
What if you should be apologizing to ET, but he didn’t ask you to? What if you were rude but didn’t realize it? What if you made a mistake but didn’t realize it? What if ET did notice some of your mistakes but didn’t complain? What if ET’s post left out a criticism he knew? Or ten?
How would these various underlying realities change your interpretations and intuitions?
What if, instead of the reply he wrote, ET had written one or ten criticisms? How would you have reacted? How does that compare to your actual reaction? For more scenarios, you could consider this with various types of criticisms or various specific criticisms.
You could also consider neutral scenarios. What if your actions had nothing bad about them, but they also weren’t good, so you didn’t deserve any thanks?
And in general you should try a lot more scenarios. E.g. what if something similar happened but with Sam Harris instead of ET? What if it was Ayn Rand who was still alive and had a forum? Try it with some other intellectuals you like, don’t like, or are indifferent to. Vary other stuff. Try the scenario with people you see as very busy, or not. What if it was John Smith, who has no fame, no fans, who you don’t have a parasocial relationship with? What if it was an advanced biology forum or some other topic where you really don’t know anything? What if it was a single digit addition math problems forum or some other topic where you have high confidence? I think you’re capable of brainstorming most of these scenarios yourself, and lots of others, if you want and try to.
For some scenarios, you can consider if you think it’s true, false, maybe, etc.